Aroused from sleep by an almighty toothache I asked myself, how come these horrible things happen in the middle of the night? The pain was causing me to have heart twitches and if I had a pair of pliers or an ice skate (see the movie, Castaway) the tooth would now be gone. In May, in Australia, a rather brash, arrogant Collins Street dentist told me that for $60,000 he could do a good job on my teeth BUT if I wanted the very best then it would set me back a lazy $100,000. Can you believe he justified it all by saying something so stupid as this: “Hey, some people drive around in a Toyota, others won’t settle for anything less than a Ferrari.
I coughed up $150 for his inane advice (he didn’t even look in my mouth, just an x-ray I provided) and I told him that dentists were down there with lawyers, charging exorbitant fees for essential services . The next day his nurse calls to say he is keen to get a start on my teeth. The guy is deaf as well as arrogant and I simply say, tell your boss I am taking my teeth overseas.
Here I am in India with a tooth/headache of child-bearing pain proportions and I am desperate enough to walk into the first clinic I find.
A pretty young lady greets me dressed in jeans and I yelp, help I am in pain! Come, let’s have a look, she replies, I am Dr Simta. Entering an ultra clean, modern room I smile at a handsome young man – her dental assistant. It only gets better as she pampers me and soothes me and works on my revolting root. The process is seam less and painless and I find myself thinking weird thoughts such as, I can’t wait to return, she is so nice, definitely the nicest dentist I have ever had – and I have had more dentists than Zsa Zsa Gabor has had husbands.
My thoughts are interrupted as that handsome dental assistant who is also the receptionist (as you do ) hands me my appointment card and the BILL.
I can not bring myself to tell you how little I paid to have the best dental experience of my life but I want to tell every high-priced arrogant dentist in the world that your days are numbered and Mr Collins Street dentist you can shove your Ferrari up your root canal.